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How to move on after a break-up?


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#1 cmdc

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Posted 13 February 2012 - 04:35 AM

what a timing for a guy to break a girl's heart just when valentines day is sooooo close! how do you move on afterwards?

#2 lakambini2005

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Posted 13 February 2012 - 10:07 AM

uso ba ang break-up kapag february 13? ano sila, nagkukuripot? haha.

Spend time for yourself. Love and pamper yourself. Be your own boyfriend. Be around dear funny people. We'll get over it.

#3 Karl Raffy

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Posted 26 February 2012 - 02:24 AM

rebound!!!Posted Image

#4 Luis

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Posted 26 February 2012 - 05:35 AM

don't expect that relationships are forever
if you have a lover enjoy the moment, feel good even though you're alone, that's life, even couples who lived together for decades experience this
don't be so emotionally dependent or you'll develop codependency which is more worst
if the relationship is not sailing smoothly then get out of it, its better to be lonely for a few weeks than continue being sad for a long period of time by holding on to a relationship which is not working anymore
masakit pero that's life

#5 sartorius27

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Posted 26 February 2012 - 07:05 AM

get hurt. cry. be sad. cry some more. just let it all out. let the tears fall.
at the end of the day, always remember that you still have YOU. :)

#6 starlight14

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Posted 29 March 2012 - 09:43 PM

I think genuine moving on happens automatically, you can't force it, but you can "speed it up". Distract yourself with hobbies, studies or other things that involve a lot of thinking. This way, you won't be reminded much about your break-up. From time to time, you'd be reminded of how painful it was but just be strong. Hopefully by then, you would have many other commitments so you can't spend too much time on that.

When you feel strong, reflect on your past relationship. Do you think it's worth it? Do you think your partner is really the one? Most likely not. Just realize that break-ups are part of life, and they are meant to make you stronger (pain makes us stronger in the long run). So use it constructively and for sure, you will indeed be more mature and brave in life :)

#7 bembmd

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Posted 04 April 2012 - 11:37 PM

it depends on who initiated the break-up, and how did the break-up commence.

remember: the one who initiated the break-up most likely is the lesser one affected.

regarding break-up scenarios, there really is no "easy" breakup. there's always someone who ends up bitter (the one left, of course).

first rule: no BREAK-UP SEX. it will occur, but the better you are fending this off, the better the break-up will continue to its normal progression
second rule: no BREAK-UP SEX. haha. Fight Club :)

once broken-up, there's no turning back. doing so will get you back to square one and repeat the process of moving on from the start.

the best way to move on? GET BUSY!
or in my terms, GET YOUR A** MOVING!

there are a lot of things to enjoy in life, don't let ONE person, ONE person ruin it all for you.

GET BUSY!

#8 miaow_miaow

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Posted 07 April 2012 - 12:14 PM

I think what worked for me in college was disassociation. talagang severe ties completely. pero college pa yun. ang panahong paiba iba ng boyfriend kada sem. it depends on the length of time na pinagsamahan nyo. kung 1 year kayo naglast, set aside 1 month of grieving. it's okay to feel sad but don't linger on that emotion. minsan kasi sa babae diba parang ang sarap maging drama queen. do yourself and your friends a favor: don't be one. kung 5 years naman kayo, half a year siguro. lalo na kung ang lalim ng pinagdaanan nyo. atsaka assess your failed relationship, ano ba iyon, physical lang? intellectual? lovey dovey? usually pag physical lang mabilis lang makagetover. eat chocolates. go to the beach. pag mejo deep kayo na tao mas mahirap mag move on kasi ididikit mo lahat ng maliit na bagay sa memory nya. burn it. discard it. be angry. set aside 1 night na pwede kang wasted. wag lang sa harap ng collegues mo. tapos after nun kalimutan mo na. kung nagkaanak kayo, ibang usapan na yan.

#9 Chipeeness

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 08:40 AM

work out ka!

#10 zuuzrap

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Posted 04 May 2012 - 03:56 AM

Focus on your goals. Focus your efforts and resources on people/things that really matter! =)

#11 Infectious.Mononucleosis

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Posted 04 May 2012 - 05:39 AM

Just make yourself busy. Posted Image

#12 Med_health

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Posted 04 May 2012 - 06:14 AM

Keep moving forward..

#13 gracieux

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Posted 16 June 2012 - 08:12 AM

nothing that an all-out shopping spree cant solve :-)

#14 sartorius27

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Posted 16 July 2012 - 06:00 PM

How to move on... Will you ever be able to? Will i? Parang ang hirap for now. Don't quite understand what i'm feeling. :(


#15 sweetserenity_md

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Posted 16 July 2012 - 07:57 PM

Sabi nga ni Kelly Clarkson "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." Smile. Life is beautiful. You'll see ;)

#16 mikemuin

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Posted 17 July 2012 - 03:11 AM

This might be helpful: http://thinksimpleno...-over-breakups/

#17 sartorius27

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Posted 17 July 2012 - 05:02 AM

This might be helpful: http://thinksimpleno...-over-breakups/


thank you.

#18 an*

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Posted 17 July 2012 - 06:52 AM

toughest thing i had to go through. would never want to go throught again...Posted Image

#19 tortuga

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Posted 17 July 2012 - 12:18 PM

Nobody can say when and how you can move on. It's a personal experience and nobody can tell you like a manual how to get over things. Sure, time will eventually heal your emotional wounds but other factors will help. It also helps if you are in an altruistic mode and in a caring profession as you deal more with other people's problems.
I never got over my first love FOR YEARS!. and it's not even close to being a sexual relationship. I still dreamt about her for years after the loss. You'll get over it but you have to make a constant effort to focus your energy to productive things and people who love you like family.

#20 Dr_Smiley

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Posted 18 July 2012 - 01:52 AM

Tortuga, I was reading your post... somehow I am speechlessPosted Image

#21 BenGurion

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Posted 18 July 2012 - 06:57 PM

There is an approach developed by dr. david burns and expounded on in his book, Intimate connections. Ive used when i was really down and it helped me alot :)

#22 tortuga

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Posted 19 July 2012 - 03:17 PM

Posted Image

Tortuga, I was reading your post... somehow I am speechlessPosted Image

Hahaha. Actually, it was partly my fault. I started very late on the romance department. I studied most of the time just to get into the schools of my choice. Then when it came, I was a grown up acting like a giddy high schooler Posted Image . I knew it was very risky and nothing may come out of it because the other person has a weird personality (like me Posted Image ). I let my emotions get over me and cloud my judgment (without logic). For the young people, it's best not to force things and enjoy variety of things and activities.

#23 cutedoctor

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Posted 26 September 2012 - 09:39 PM

what a timing for a guy to break a girl's heart just when valentines day is sooooo close! how do you move on afterwards?



madami ka advice makukuha pero balewala lahat yun kung hindi mo tutulungan sarili mo. how do you move? help yourself move 1st

#24 VMC

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Posted 17 October 2012 - 08:11 AM

Act mature.

#25 EMS

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 01:23 AM

pag lalaki ang nakipagbreak mahihirapan ang babae sa simula.. pero since madami silang support kaya mabilis lang yan makagetover..

 

pag babae ang nakipag break ok ang boys sa simula.. kasi ibang boys parang makakawala :)) pero after marerealize din nila na masgusto nila kasama ang girl.. at jan na ang inuman sessions :))



#26 Eidolon

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Posted 15 December 2016 - 06:56 PM

Nothing is more painful than your wife breaking up with you, together you lost the love of your life & your only son. I always pictured myself as like a family picture of us me torn out & dump in a trash. It's very difficult to move on because you are forever somehow attach to the person because you have a son to her. Is it always be the mother who have the sole custody of our son? Why dads matters also! On the first she's the one who wants things like this for a very abstract reasons. I did everything you guys mentioned, getting busy, focus on thyself, hobbies, reading, etc. including the pain, exhaustion & frustration of residency training but at the end of the day when I reflect I still feel the pain of it.. know what this is the only type of pain that we don't have a medication modalities.. for all the dads out there who are feeling the same way as I am I wish you true happiness.. keep on praying it works!

#27 MaryAspiringMD

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Posted 15 January 2017 - 11:59 AM

This topic caught my eye. I just broke up from a long term relationship of almost 3 years. Its not working anymore. But I am still suffering everyday from late night pits of crying. 😭 What should I do?

#28 MaryAspiringMD

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Posted 15 January 2017 - 11:59 AM

This topic caught my eye. I just broke up from a long term relationship of almost 3 years. Its not working anymore. But I am still suffering everyday from late night pits of crying. 😭 What should I do?

#29 jess15

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Posted 16 January 2017 - 05:24 AM

This topic caught my eye. I just broke up from a long term relationship of almost 3 years. Its not working anymore. But I am still suffering everyday from late night pits of crying. 😭 What should I do?


Just remind yourself why ot had to end in the first place. Focus on other aspects of your life so that you can grow more as a person. Don't doubt the process and the meaning of what has happened, let time heal your heart. Most of all, pray and love yourself.

#30 annaelis

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Posted 22 January 2017 - 01:05 AM

This topic caught my eye. I just broke up from a long term relationship of almost 3 years. Its not working anymore. But I am still suffering everyday from late night pits of crying. What should I do?

 

Hi! Remember why it started, remember why it ended. Remember it and don't be bitter. Just accept na there are things in life that are just not meant for us. Do you believe in destiny? I do! I believe that everything will fall into place at some point soon :hearts:

 

Consider your current situation. (Me, for example lang: I'm an MD aspirant. I'm a graduating student. I have NLE to worry about. Having my boyfriend break up with me NGAYONG JANUARY would be really beneficial for me. I will even thank him for that kasi buti ngayon at hindi April or June na incoming boards kasi mawawasak buhay ko haha! Thank you boyfriend binigyan mo pa ako ng 3 months to move on!!!) Remember that there is always something to be thankful for!

 

As for me, my last relationship was years ago, It took me a bit to move-on, but I did. The break up gave me new eyes and made me more focused in achieving my dreams of being an #RNMD I became so much stronger, so much better than before. :hearts:

 

I recommend this song from Legally Blonde: The Musical "So Much Better" graveh yung impact sakin niyan

 

Don't worry, the tears will soon go away. Sabi nga ni Edward Cullen sa book na New Moon, "Time heals all wounds for your kind". Kung ayaw mo maniwala sakin, maniwala ka nalang kay Edward Cullen. :laugh2:

 

Also, find a hobby! I love reading. I was able to read more books after ze break-up. I was able to spent time with my family more. I was able to sleep nights without wondering kung 'bakit di siya nagtetext'. I was able to fall in-love again with fictional characters hihi. My world did not revolve on just one person nalang, it got bigger and bigger and bigger - and now I'm going to be a doctor (sooooon!!!)

 

Goodluck, dear!

 

I impart you these words from Rupi Kaur

 

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#31 annaelis

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Posted 22 January 2017 - 01:08 AM

Nothing is more painful than your wife breaking up with you, together you lost the love of your life & your only son. I always pictured myself as like a family picture of us me torn out & dump in a trash. It's very difficult to move on because you are forever somehow attach to the person because you have a son to her. Is it always be the mother who have the sole custody of our son? Why dads matters also! On the first she's the one who wants things like this for a very abstract reasons. I did everything you guys mentioned, getting busy, focus on thyself, hobbies, reading, etc. including the pain, exhaustion & frustration of residency training but at the end of the day when I reflect I still feel the pain of it.. know what this is the only type of pain that we don't have a medication modalities.. for all the dads out there who are feeling the same way as I am I wish you true happiness.. keep on praying it works!

 

 

I hope you find happiness, soon! I cannot imagine the pain you went through. Stand strong, doc!